Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Stressed (Marcus)

You can easily sum up how we're feeling in a few sentences:

1. Stressed out of our minds
2. Hating working here

and it all comes down to

3. Lesson plans. F(*@*(king lesson plans.

We are thinking about them practically 24/7. Even though we have access to lots of things online, different plans and the like, our hearts are not in it. We feel stressed all of the time. The teaching part itself is ok. It goes by quickly and it's generally alright, but the planning of new lessons? This is what's completely and utterly getting us down. We hate it, we honestly do.

We came here under the expectation that we would be following from a book, following a curriculum, and then were told when we got here that no, the oral language teachers have to come up with their own courseware. Yay!

So here we sit, staring at our laptops, trying to come up with ideas. The more we look at them, the less we can think straight. There's ideas and lessons and plans all over the internet, but none of them seem to match what we need. None of them feel right. We just cant think straight. We cant think period. Yet all day every day they are at the back of our minds polluting absolutely every other thing we do.

It all hits about this part of the week, as it is getting close to needing something new. Friday is the start of the new set of classes for the senior 17 to 18 year old students. Monday is the start of the new week for the 12-13 year olds. We need something new and different for each of them as we cannot use the same class for both as their english levels are different.

It's all well and good having a concept for a game or an activity, or an idea, hey, let's teach the kids colours! We need to string a whole heap of them together and fill a 40 or 45 minute lesson. When you are standing there before the class, if you do not feel confident, the kids can feel it too and feed off it. It's like an animal smelling fear. If we flounder before them, they eat us alive, and that's basically that. So for our own sakes we need something plausible, and we need something to fill every single minute, as even 2 minutes of inactivity feels like an eternity when you have an audience of that size staring at you.

So today, we feel completely unhappy. Completely unhappy. It's days like this where we feel like telling them exactly where they can stick their job. For two unexperienced teachers to have to create 100% of their classes is just bullshit. Particularly when we have no support from the other english teachers - who can speak only very basic english themselves. They teach from simple textbooks and seem to spend most of their days sitting in the teaching offices doing god only knows what. Even other westerners at the school would have been good, to bounce ideas off, but no, it's only the two of us and we both have barely any idea what to do next. This is like day 1 of a new job, not knowing what to do, but here, there's no-one to actually show you. And considering we have the whole culture shock thing on top of what we feel is a crap job, it all adds up to being one massive pile of crap.

Blah I say. Blah blah blah.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

heya guys,
It's a shame to hear that you're having a bugger of a time with the lesson plans. I know that feeling of complete anxiety wondering what you'll do to fill time, and come off like you know whats going on, while in the classroom.
It will get easier. Failing that...another school, another city?
Now at least you have certainly pinned down what you both want:

A) working shower that doesn't give you tueretts syndrome before 9am

B) some support in teaching, through materials, or just even generaly someone who understands your needs

C) a place with a few shops/ comforts, and places to explore

I know that you'll make the right decision, whatever happens, but you don't haave to be unhappy for a long time. If pain persists, see your travel agent!

Marcus and Courtney said...

We're just stuck in a rut. It's these bloody lesson plans. They're so deceptively difficult. The subject matter and everything is not difficult, but we are both just in a rut.

We sit and stare at the laptops and just cant think. We just cant come up with ideas. It's like brain block or something.

We are both capable on any given day to sit down and do this kind of thing, but somehow we have just both gotten into this hole we cant get out of.

Since writing that post I have taught 3 x 40 minute lessons in a row and I feel much better because of it. We always feel better after teaching, it's the beforehand - before we know what we're doing - ie focusing on not having a new lesson together yet for friday - friday which has 4 classes.

It stinks right now and i am sure given a little time we will get out of it. If we dont, if we get another month or so down the road and we feel the same, we will do something major about it - but for now, we just need to find a way out of this bloody hole. It has us feeling like absolute crap. Stressed, upset..you name it. It just feels terrible and it's eaten our ability to think straight and make these god forsaken lesson plans.

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

lolb said...

heya Courtney and Marcus,

It's Lol here, you know...... Sarahs friend that never got to meet you both before you left!

I hope you don't mind me reading your blog, I am enjoying it very much...sorry if that sounds cheeky considering the hardship you are going through:-)

I really, really, really, wish that Sarah had arranged a meet up with you guys before you left... my partner James taught English in Japan for 2 years then for 2 years at latrobe Uni and then ran a department at the Language school for foreign students at RMIT.

James basically wrote a book in Japan on lesson plans and we have a lot of material here that he could have given you. I know it's too late now, but if there is anything we can do to help, or any advice you want please ask..... James could even talk to you on Skype if you have access to it. I think he has been where you are right now ( stressed and alone in a foreign country) so he may be able to give you some useful advice.

I'm feeling for you both, hope things improve soon.

Lol

Anonymous said...

hi there,
i have been reading and reading your posts, im really really enjoying reading about your adventures, very candid, i admire both your honesty.
just a little something i have been thinking, if you are still planning on heading to shanghai, i recommend eating at ajisen ramen, i have read on net, that there are many in shanghai, i ate there 5 years ish ago, in a busy shopping and entertainment area near the Bund. i had a great vegi noodle soup. but plenty of choice!
ohh, i know sam and my teaching experience was totally different, for example, we had a text book to teach from! but describing stuff was great, eg. people ( freckles, beard, adams apple) furniture, lost bag at airport, ect. spending the start of the lesson, preparing words, giving them lesson language, some simple insert the word sentance. eg. it has.......
then using a strong student, demonstrate what you what them to do, then in pairs, get them to describe something/someone they have lost, want to buy. make it a guessing game, at the end of the game, you could talk about it, any q's.
just an idea.
i think sam has mentioned, we have a few friends in the teaching game, my friend julz, has been doing it for years, korea, a few times, thrown in the deep end and turkey now. She had times when she totally hated it, and still does, but now is kinda addicted, i think she does it for the students.
i dont mean to sound like blarr blarr, but just trying to help out, you never know where an idea will take you!!!!
keep up the blog.
hope you are both happy and healthy.
smiles jess

Marcus and Courtney said...

Hey Jess, Hey Lol,

Of couse we don't mind you reading! We keep it as much for our own ability to look back on, as a way of keeping in touch with people back home, who we totally miss.

It's also a great way to vent as our moods tend to swing to and fro from day to day.

I think it's true, the best part about the teaching itself is in fact the students.

I set off to class today in a foul mood, I really really didnt want to teach today as this morning, as you can probably tell from what I wrote, we were both incredibly down. I started off a bit quiet in the class but soon perked up.

Come time of teaching the younger kids, I was feeling great. Like I have said previously, they are an absolutely innocent joy to deal with. The first few moments I was in the class, this little fat boy came up to me and said, "Hello! I have an english name, it's Tom! You know, like the cartoon cat, Tom! People sometimes call me Fat Tom (and he was pretty fat). I just love that cartoon cat!"

This kid was cute to the max, and about 12 or so. It turns out there was also a Jerry in the class, Tom & Jerry - i think they have named themselves after the show.

Actually in that class, I had a little boy named Joy, A boy named Jeep, a boy named Hill, another called Cook - where the HELL are these guys name shopping?!?

Anyway we felt better.

Anticipating the lessons is the killer. Tonight we have gone out to dinner, but have also put together two new lesson plans and are aiming at putting together yet another two so we have one up our sleeve.

I am positive by doing this we will overcome the worst source of our stress, which is these plans.

If anyone has any other advice - such as your husband Lol - we would readily listen to it.

cheers
Marcus

Anonymous said...

Heya you guys Kerry here, I could send over some info on buying and enjoying Yachting up the east coast of Australia and never getting out of port that should keep them interested for about a year.
Tell them they were lucky I was not around in their great trading days of old they would never have got their silks / spices and stuff on the market.
Or maybe thats why they are not so advanced now shipping magnats like me were around then.
Yes its great reading and as I said just the pain barrier and I would not worry so much they are not.
One thing you should have learnt by now is they dont really care or mind too much either so just play the same game . They don't let it get to them so be concerned but try your best and they will be Delighted with whatever you come up with. YOU PAIR ARE THE EXPERTS in their eyes so whatever you say or do they will be happy to accept and to me thats the main factor to get you thru this hurdle.Great and very commendable that you are both so strung out by not letting them down but am sure if you take the pressure off yourselves and go with the flow am sure you will come out on top. Your naievity will get you places as well the way you are writing all this stuff is reality and thats the best thing of all to teach so think about that. They do not think like us at all so you have to adjust your mindset to a different direction and there you will find the answer GRASSHOPPER my boy. (kung foo ) if you can remember that. I am going in the pool now so hope your Friday classes are going well.
Kerry xxx